I started listening to Andrew Peterson in college, when he first released Carried Along (now out of print but available on iTunes), or maybe when he started touring with Caedmon's Call (not a band anymore but still a band). His lyrics are approachable and deep at the same time, and they have resonated for me personally over the years. Take the song "Hosanna" from the album, "Resurrection Letters, Volume II". We tend to think that "Hosanna" is praises of jubilation to our Lord Jesus, but in other languages (and apparently in the original), it means "Save us!" or "Savior!" and that is what he sings about in this song. It makes me think that we have no idea what those people in the street were begging for. I always thought that Hosanna in the highest was a phrase of praise to Christ as King, but they didn't know He was THE King. I didn't change my view until I lived in Brasil and read a Bible in Portuguese. The text says "Salvo!" which translates loosely to "Save." Christ came, and he humbled Himself to be a man. Philippians says that He didn't even view equality with God as something to be grasped. As a result, He was granted a name above every name, that every knee should bow, and every tongue confess, that Jesus is Lord. As in, He was the king that was foreshadowed in the Old Testament, who would be King of all Kings. In "Hosanna," Peterson has the verses speak of our struggles with lies and addiction and falling when we should stand. Save us from ourselves, Lord, because we are sinners. Save us from our own care, because Yours is better. Save us from the world, Lord, but do not let us ignore it, because it needs You as much as we do.
December 19, 2015
Hubster drove me clear across town yesterday so we could go to a sold-out concert (Behold the Lamb of God by Andrew Peterson and company) that we didn't even have tickets for because my planning abilities aren't the best. We walked in the door at will-call and begged for any extra tickets they had. They were technically sold out, but since the concert actually tells the story of the gospel, they didn't want to turn anyone away. I haven't seen the show in at least 7 years (not since I've been married) and hubster has never seen it.
I started listening to Andrew Peterson in college, when he first released Carried Along (now out of print but available on iTunes), or maybe when he started touring with Caedmon's Call (not a band anymore but still a band). His lyrics are approachable and deep at the same time, and they have resonated for me personally over the years. Take the song "Hosanna" from the album, "Resurrection Letters, Volume II". We tend to think that "Hosanna" is praises of jubilation to our Lord Jesus, but in other languages (and apparently in the original), it means "Save us!" or "Savior!" and that is what he sings about in this song. It makes me think that we have no idea what those people in the street were begging for. I always thought that Hosanna in the highest was a phrase of praise to Christ as King, but they didn't know He was THE King. I didn't change my view until I lived in Brasil and read a Bible in Portuguese. The text says "Salvo!" which translates loosely to "Save." Christ came, and he humbled Himself to be a man. Philippians says that He didn't even view equality with God as something to be grasped. As a result, He was granted a name above every name, that every knee should bow, and every tongue confess, that Jesus is Lord. As in, He was the king that was foreshadowed in the Old Testament, who would be King of all Kings. In "Hosanna," Peterson has the verses speak of our struggles with lies and addiction and falling when we should stand. Save us from ourselves, Lord, because we are sinners. Save us from our own care, because Yours is better. Save us from the world, Lord, but do not let us ignore it, because it needs You as much as we do.
I started listening to Andrew Peterson in college, when he first released Carried Along (now out of print but available on iTunes), or maybe when he started touring with Caedmon's Call (not a band anymore but still a band). His lyrics are approachable and deep at the same time, and they have resonated for me personally over the years. Take the song "Hosanna" from the album, "Resurrection Letters, Volume II". We tend to think that "Hosanna" is praises of jubilation to our Lord Jesus, but in other languages (and apparently in the original), it means "Save us!" or "Savior!" and that is what he sings about in this song. It makes me think that we have no idea what those people in the street were begging for. I always thought that Hosanna in the highest was a phrase of praise to Christ as King, but they didn't know He was THE King. I didn't change my view until I lived in Brasil and read a Bible in Portuguese. The text says "Salvo!" which translates loosely to "Save." Christ came, and he humbled Himself to be a man. Philippians says that He didn't even view equality with God as something to be grasped. As a result, He was granted a name above every name, that every knee should bow, and every tongue confess, that Jesus is Lord. As in, He was the king that was foreshadowed in the Old Testament, who would be King of all Kings. In "Hosanna," Peterson has the verses speak of our struggles with lies and addiction and falling when we should stand. Save us from ourselves, Lord, because we are sinners. Save us from our own care, because Yours is better. Save us from the world, Lord, but do not let us ignore it, because it needs You as much as we do.
December 13, 2015
Year of Difficulty and Joy
This year has been a hard one. I've lost 30 pounds that I needed to lose, I've seen 2 nieces (one blood-related and one not) born, a brother married, a brother engaged, and I laugh as I realize that I followed the "hard year" with the good things that have happened.
It's been another year of living far away from family. It's been a year of juggling work and home and meds and emotions. It's been a year of numbness until about 2 months ago. There are things that have been hard that are in my control, and there are things that have been out of my control. I like to think I've been good about not stressing about the things that are out of my control, but I haven't been so good about changing those things that I'm in control of. Am I scared of succeeding? Am I resigned to be stagnant? Does the year look hard because I've had a hard week? Or a hard holiday season?
I'm reminding myself (especially lately) that writing is such an outlet for me. It puts thoughts into words and helps me put things out there "into the universe." If I don't write, my thoughts stay in and stew in their own juices. Writing helps me make sense of things, or at least figure out what might be rational and what might not be. I'm trying to write a little each day, whether it be in my journal or here. Some of what gets into my journal makes it here, some not.
At the end of today, I'm thankful that I have a husband who loves me more than I know, a sturdy roof over my head, plenty of food to eat, and friends who love me if I'll only let them.
It's been another year of living far away from family. It's been a year of juggling work and home and meds and emotions. It's been a year of numbness until about 2 months ago. There are things that have been hard that are in my control, and there are things that have been out of my control. I like to think I've been good about not stressing about the things that are out of my control, but I haven't been so good about changing those things that I'm in control of. Am I scared of succeeding? Am I resigned to be stagnant? Does the year look hard because I've had a hard week? Or a hard holiday season?
I'm reminding myself (especially lately) that writing is such an outlet for me. It puts thoughts into words and helps me put things out there "into the universe." If I don't write, my thoughts stay in and stew in their own juices. Writing helps me make sense of things, or at least figure out what might be rational and what might not be. I'm trying to write a little each day, whether it be in my journal or here. Some of what gets into my journal makes it here, some not.
At the end of today, I'm thankful that I have a husband who loves me more than I know, a sturdy roof over my head, plenty of food to eat, and friends who love me if I'll only let them.
December 11, 2015
I've been listening lately to my favorite Christmas album ever. "Behold the Lamb of God" by Andrew Peterson and other artists. It's an amazing telling of the Christmas story from Creation to the birth of Christ. It includes the Israelites wandering in the wilderness and what Mary's night in the stable must have been like (probably not very silent).
The story itself moves me every time I hear it. Having been to Jerusalem and Bethlehem, the emotions I experience when I listen to the album are overwhelming, again and again. I've been "there." The place where Christ was born. The place where the shepherds saw the angel. The garden of Gethsemane. The Old City where the trial must have been held. The tomb. As they say in Jerusalem, "If it didn't happen exactly here, it was somewhere close." And that's true. Jerusalem and Bethlehem are only 5 miles apart. The wilderness (that Jesus spent 40 days in, right?) is just that. Wilderness. No trees, just grass, hills, and dirt.
God created. His creation sinned. He made a way to be made right with Himself in the Old Testament that foreshadowed the ultimate Way in the New Testament. The Israelites (His people) wandered and lived "without" Him, it seemed, for years. And then a baby came. Just like He said. One who would be the Savior of the world. God had planned this in eternity. And we as His creation are too short-sighted to see it. I am thankful today for the Holy Spirit who gives this insight. I do not know how; it is a mystery, as Paul says.
The story itself moves me every time I hear it. Having been to Jerusalem and Bethlehem, the emotions I experience when I listen to the album are overwhelming, again and again. I've been "there." The place where Christ was born. The place where the shepherds saw the angel. The garden of Gethsemane. The Old City where the trial must have been held. The tomb. As they say in Jerusalem, "If it didn't happen exactly here, it was somewhere close." And that's true. Jerusalem and Bethlehem are only 5 miles apart. The wilderness (that Jesus spent 40 days in, right?) is just that. Wilderness. No trees, just grass, hills, and dirt.
God created. His creation sinned. He made a way to be made right with Himself in the Old Testament that foreshadowed the ultimate Way in the New Testament. The Israelites (His people) wandered and lived "without" Him, it seemed, for years. And then a baby came. Just like He said. One who would be the Savior of the world. God had planned this in eternity. And we as His creation are too short-sighted to see it. I am thankful today for the Holy Spirit who gives this insight. I do not know how; it is a mystery, as Paul says.
December 10, 2015
Ask, even if you don't receive
I have been reminded lately how important it is to simply (or not so simply) ask for what we need, whether it comes to pass or not.
Most days, I have no idea what I need or even want. Yesterday, I had a hard time at work. I was exhausted, on the verge of tears all day, and felt awful. I knew that I couldn't make it until close (it was my LONG day). I kept debating with myself about whether I should call the scheduler or whether I should try to make it until 9:00. At one point, my internal dialogue sounded like this:
"OMG, I can't believe I HAVE to make it until 9:00. I don't think I can, but I have to." (READ: IT'S THE ADULT THING TO DO AND IT'S YOUR JOB.)
"Ummmm, NO. Call H and see if she can find someone to cover."
"But what if she can't find someone?"
Yeah, I called her about 2:30 (after debating internally for HOURS, dang that introspection!), and the mere act of calling to make my need known was empowering. It's like telling her that I wasn't going to make it till 9 made me able to make it till 9 if she couldn't find someone. It's kind of crazy.
I was prompted to write this post not only because I'm proud of myself for stepping up to ask for something yesterday, but because almost 5 years ago, I was reminded by the Father that I could have prayed about something I was worried about. I so often ask for prayers and don't pray myself. I'd like to say it's because I'm in the middle of a crisis/panic attack/etc, but I can't say that in all honesty. I just don't come boldly to the throne of grace like I should, because I'm scared. I'm scared that I'll ask for the wrong things. Like being able to go home from work on a day that I just can't handle being an adult. But then I am blessed by God's grace of being able to do just that.
Father, You know our struggles and our inabilities. You know where we just can't. Sometimes you walk alongside us to give us strength. Sometimes you let us slide so that we can curl up in your lap and recover. Today, I am thankful for both.
Most days, I have no idea what I need or even want. Yesterday, I had a hard time at work. I was exhausted, on the verge of tears all day, and felt awful. I knew that I couldn't make it until close (it was my LONG day). I kept debating with myself about whether I should call the scheduler or whether I should try to make it until 9:00. At one point, my internal dialogue sounded like this:
"OMG, I can't believe I HAVE to make it until 9:00. I don't think I can, but I have to." (READ: IT'S THE ADULT THING TO DO AND IT'S YOUR JOB.)
"Ummmm, NO. Call H and see if she can find someone to cover."
"But what if she can't find someone?"
Yeah, I called her about 2:30 (after debating internally for HOURS, dang that introspection!), and the mere act of calling to make my need known was empowering. It's like telling her that I wasn't going to make it till 9 made me able to make it till 9 if she couldn't find someone. It's kind of crazy.
I was prompted to write this post not only because I'm proud of myself for stepping up to ask for something yesterday, but because almost 5 years ago, I was reminded by the Father that I could have prayed about something I was worried about. I so often ask for prayers and don't pray myself. I'd like to say it's because I'm in the middle of a crisis/panic attack/etc, but I can't say that in all honesty. I just don't come boldly to the throne of grace like I should, because I'm scared. I'm scared that I'll ask for the wrong things. Like being able to go home from work on a day that I just can't handle being an adult. But then I am blessed by God's grace of being able to do just that.
Father, You know our struggles and our inabilities. You know where we just can't. Sometimes you walk alongside us to give us strength. Sometimes you let us slide so that we can curl up in your lap and recover. Today, I am thankful for both.
December 08, 2015
Authenticity and comfort
I've been writing in my journal (who knew that journaling wasn't a real word?) a little this evening and came across the frustrating fact that most of what I do day to day feels un-authentic. Then I asked myself, what if I have equated authentic with comfortable? I am extremely uncomfortable in my job; it is WAY out of my comfort zone because I have to be organized, pay attention to detail, talk to people, deal with non-stop interruptions and stupid questions, and generally be nice. While the last one isn't such a far stretch, throw it in with all the others and it might or might not happen. There's a reason that I'm in the other room listening to "Behold the Lamb of God" (favorite Christmas album EVER) with my journal and computer even though hubby has been napping for a few hours (he works 6am-2:30pm). Being away is essential for my well-being, especially given all of the above daily job "duties."
I am uncomfortable with how much I love my husband. I am uncomfortable that salvation and grace are FREE. I am also uncomfortable that the process of refinement is uncomfortable. I am uncomfortable that I'm not good at everything I do.
"Life begins at the end of our comfort zone." --Neale Donald Walsh
I am uncomfortable with how much I love my husband. I am uncomfortable that salvation and grace are FREE. I am also uncomfortable that the process of refinement is uncomfortable. I am uncomfortable that I'm not good at everything I do.
"Life begins at the end of our comfort zone." --Neale Donald Walsh
“Life begins at the edge of our comfort zone”
“Life begins at the edge of our comfort zone”
“Life begins at the edge of our comfort zone”
October 22, 2015
Well, obviously I haven't posted in awhile, and part of that is due to feeling like I didn't have anything worth posting. Today's writing is worth posting, because I decided to stop my antidepressants. I've been on them for 4 years and had a revelation this weekend. I am NUMB. I'm tired of being numb. I forgot a couple of doses while I was out of town (yes, I had them with me; I just forgot) and just didn't start back on them when I got back home.
As I'm a healthcare professional, I KNOW the caveats about working with your doctor to stop, and tapering down. I did neither. I stopped cold turkey, and thankfully I was on one that doesn't have super severe side effects from stopping (can there be side effects if there is no drug?). I'm experiencing "withdrawal" symptoms, but nothing severe, and I'm finding that my impulses to do crazy (good) stuff are coming back. I read something today about always letting those close to you know that you love them, so I undressed and got in the shower with hubby. The impulse was to kiss him hard and tell him how much I love him. On the meds? That wasn't there.
Over the weekend, I had a few GOOD cries, and it was nice to actually feel something again, even if negative at the time. I know the negative and positive will ebb and flow, and that's okay. I'm ready to face both, because without one (the lows), you cannot have the other (the highs). I've started reading my Bible again and am content in both the Lord and my decision. Passion doesn't come from unfeeling. It comes from deep feeling, which is scary and awesome, all at the same time.
November 12, 2014
Breaking Point
I need a break. And I don't mean vacation, from which I've just returned. I just got off a conference call with my regional manager that was a lovely way to start a day off. I'm trying to tell myself not to let it ruin my day, but Father God is using it to remind me that I'm at my breaking point. And when I get to my breaking point, I'm usually WAY past my breaking point.
It's been awhile since I've been here. Tired. Broken. Exhausted, even. On the verge of tears. Hoping against hope that I don't have to go to work. Letting every little thing get to me. Joy? Gone. Life? Sucked out. It's almost a place of despair. A black hole that has no exit.
In between writing this, I've been checking other sites, and saw this on Facebook: Colossians 3:2 "Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth." I needed that this morning to get out of my quagmire. I'm not out, but I certainly can say that my focus today won't be my situation. It will be breathing prayers and listening to what my Father has to say. I am absolutely at my wit's end, but He knows that. He may be silent, but I will not fret. He is near.
It's been awhile since I've been here. Tired. Broken. Exhausted, even. On the verge of tears. Hoping against hope that I don't have to go to work. Letting every little thing get to me. Joy? Gone. Life? Sucked out. It's almost a place of despair. A black hole that has no exit.
In between writing this, I've been checking other sites, and saw this on Facebook: Colossians 3:2 "Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth." I needed that this morning to get out of my quagmire. I'm not out, but I certainly can say that my focus today won't be my situation. It will be breathing prayers and listening to what my Father has to say. I am absolutely at my wit's end, but He knows that. He may be silent, but I will not fret. He is near.
November 10, 2014
Jerks Need Jesus
Back after a long hiatus. Marriage will do that to you -- nothing changes, everything is the same. It's really not a bad thing, just difficult to get away. I understand what Paul meant when he said that married peoples' interests are divided in 1 Corinthians 7.
Today is post-worthy because hubby and I just got back from Brasil, where we met and fell in love. We went with the group that I first went with, that fateful year that Hugo Chavez got overthrown. A second time. They're family to us, and they consider us family too. It was fantastic to serve alongside them, and satisfying to fall right back into the role I had for so long.
The role I have here? Not so easy. I'm the manager of my particular pharmacy and have been gone for a week. What do I walk into? Chaos. What I wanted to say to one man would have cost me my job. Then came the voice. "Jennifer, these people need Jesus." I've become so jaded and so impatient with people who act like they have no sense that I've forgotten why I'm there.
People are stupid. They are rude. They come in looking for a fight. They come into my place and don't feel good. They complain about anything and everything. People are jerks. Jerks that need Jesus. How much more of a jerk would I be if I didn't have him? I shudder to think, because it's pretty jerky around here.
I struggle to marry my mission with my job description. What would the Lord have me do? How would He have me handle the internal and external struggle to mesh the two? His command and corporate expectations. My ministry and management. All I know at this point is that God has been gracious to remind me why I am where I am.
Today is post-worthy because hubby and I just got back from Brasil, where we met and fell in love. We went with the group that I first went with, that fateful year that Hugo Chavez got overthrown. A second time. They're family to us, and they consider us family too. It was fantastic to serve alongside them, and satisfying to fall right back into the role I had for so long.
The role I have here? Not so easy. I'm the manager of my particular pharmacy and have been gone for a week. What do I walk into? Chaos. What I wanted to say to one man would have cost me my job. Then came the voice. "Jennifer, these people need Jesus." I've become so jaded and so impatient with people who act like they have no sense that I've forgotten why I'm there.
People are stupid. They are rude. They come in looking for a fight. They come into my place and don't feel good. They complain about anything and everything. People are jerks. Jerks that need Jesus. How much more of a jerk would I be if I didn't have him? I shudder to think, because it's pretty jerky around here.
I struggle to marry my mission with my job description. What would the Lord have me do? How would He have me handle the internal and external struggle to mesh the two? His command and corporate expectations. My ministry and management. All I know at this point is that God has been gracious to remind me why I am where I am.
February 10, 2011
Follow Me
This crazy journey started 8 & 1/2 years ago with the words, "Follow Me." I never, ever thought that the Lord would come to me that closely. But He did. In the years following, He has felt both close and far, far away, but I know that the fact remains that He has been present. He has led me, He has challenged me, He has healed me, He has comforted me, He has shown me that He has been intimately involved in all aspects of my life.
We're already 1 & 1/2 months into 2011, and I'm doing okay. I got promoted at work because my partner quit. The administrator in me (who hasn't been very active until lately) is alive and well, trying to create some order in my store.
I've taken on the goal to read through the Bible this year using this reading plan. A friend's blog referred me to it, and it's nice because there are built-in make-up days -- there's not a reading scheduled every single day, so if you miss one, there's time to catch up! It's been really nice so far -- I've missed days and made them up during the make-up time. Built-in grace and flexibility for a plan is good.
D-man and I are headed to Atlanta next weekend for his little bro's wedding. Little bro is marrying my former roomie (in Brasil), so we'll get to see tons of people we've known for years. It should be a fun celebration.
God has been really gracious lately to simply show me that He answers our heart's cry. When we had inclement weather last week, and our vendor order was delayed because of ice, He reminded me ever so kindly, "You could have prayed about this, you know." I have no idea if it would have made a difference in the arrival of the order or not. But I could have made my need known. His word to me since September has been, "Come to Me." What I hear Him saying is, "Ask Me anything. I may not answer immediately, but please feel free to come to Me and ask Me anything. I want that intimacy with you."
I've taken on the goal to read through the Bible this year using this reading plan. A friend's blog referred me to it, and it's nice because there are built-in make-up days -- there's not a reading scheduled every single day, so if you miss one, there's time to catch up! It's been really nice so far -- I've missed days and made them up during the make-up time. Built-in grace and flexibility for a plan is good.
D-man and I are headed to Atlanta next weekend for his little bro's wedding. Little bro is marrying my former roomie (in Brasil), so we'll get to see tons of people we've known for years. It should be a fun celebration.
God has been really gracious lately to simply show me that He answers our heart's cry. When we had inclement weather last week, and our vendor order was delayed because of ice, He reminded me ever so kindly, "You could have prayed about this, you know." I have no idea if it would have made a difference in the arrival of the order or not. But I could have made my need known. His word to me since September has been, "Come to Me." What I hear Him saying is, "Ask Me anything. I may not answer immediately, but please feel free to come to Me and ask Me anything. I want that intimacy with you."
December 04, 2010
Another installment in the saga....
My house is a mess. Yet again. I can blame it on Christmas, or the fact that I'm about to travel, or the fact that we're both working like crazy people (D-man got a job a couple of months ago -- yay!). But I won't. I will, however, choose to state it as fact and not as judgement. My house is a mess. Period.
October 13, 2010
I was talking to a friend the other night and we were discussing the lament of women everywhere: we don't have it all together.
That's right. I. Don't. Haveitalltogether. As hard as that is to face some days, it's a relief to see it in black and white. Fortunately (or not), being married makes me realize how true that is. My house is NOT spotless (though there's nothing growing in the refrigerator or anything), I am cranky when I haven't had enough sleep, and sometimes I still like having the house to myself. I can blame my annoyance on D-man trying to talk to me when I'm ready to go to sleep (I do the same thing to him!), yet I wonder if that isn't just the easy way out, because taking a deeper look would mean facing my own issues.
Being married really is like looking in a mirror and finding your own issues and worst parts on display. Some days. Other days it's nice to come home to someone who is fully aware that you don't have it all together and doesn't mind, because he knew that long before you did.
That's right. I. Don't. Haveitalltogether. As hard as that is to face some days, it's a relief to see it in black and white. Fortunately (or not), being married makes me realize how true that is. My house is NOT spotless (though there's nothing growing in the refrigerator or anything), I am cranky when I haven't had enough sleep, and sometimes I still like having the house to myself. I can blame my annoyance on D-man trying to talk to me when I'm ready to go to sleep (I do the same thing to him!), yet I wonder if that isn't just the easy way out, because taking a deeper look would mean facing my own issues.
Being married really is like looking in a mirror and finding your own issues and worst parts on display. Some days. Other days it's nice to come home to someone who is fully aware that you don't have it all together and doesn't mind, because he knew that long before you did.
September 15, 2010
Update
Lots has been going on lately -- I haven't had much time to write. Or, more properly, I haven't taken any time to write. What with the emotions swirling around inside my head and heart, I don't really want to sit still long enough to give them headway. Thanks, J, for praying that I'd be more of a feeler. Now pray that I would know how to deal with emotions.
Lately:
Lately:
- We went camping and to San Antonio over Labor Day Weekend. Stephen F. Austin state park (a short 40-minute drive from our house!) and the Riverwalk make for good weekend spots.
- I finally understand why the Alamo was so important, even though we lost bad (read: everybody died).
- I have gone from wanting to walk out the door of my job and never come back (several times in one day!) to finally feeling like I have a little bit of traction.
- I have one friend who is newly engaged, and am waiting on 2 more in the near future. We have at least 3 weddings to travel to next year.
- We are going to visit Big Shady's parents this weekend, and I am so looking forward to what looks to be a refreshing and healing time.
August 02, 2010
For months and months, I was stuck in John 4. The part with the woman at the well. I was there so long I fell in and couldn't get out. The Lord finally let me move to John 5 a couple of months ago, and I thought it would be really neat to start in Mark, since it's a short gospel and all. No dice. This morning when I turned to Mark, I sensed the Spirit's prompting that I still am not finished with John 5. I went from the well to the pool in a matter of seconds, yet I cannot seem to get up. I am weighed down with the cares of the world, with fear, and with responsibility.
Praises to the Giver of Life, in this world and the next!
Praises to the Giver of Life, in this world and the next!
July 30, 2010
There and Back Again
We've been in Brasil this week with a medical/construction team, and as much as I've been lazy over the past 6 months or so (I don't like to listen), God has been gracious with me, as always. I am reminded that He always wants to show us Himself, and He is always willing to talk if we are quiet long enough to listen. With the stresses of everyday life (work, keeping a home, paying bills, being married), I have a very hard time getting away long enough to be still. I could come up with a laundry list of other issues, but I won't.
I have spent the last year and a half in a city that is totally different than any culture I've ever experienced, in a job that is, frankly, hard many more days than not, and in a season of providing for the family. And I've complained. Oh, how I've complained. I have worried. I am Israel. I have seen God part the Red Sea, and I've made it to....the wilderness. My memory is shorter than it's ever been, and I have a husband who sees my complaining spirit and still doesn't complain himself. Part of me thinks that this season is to teach me how to be in the wilderness, that I need to know how to be in the wilderness without complaining, for God has brought me here and He has plans for later. For now, this is His plan. He is asking for my obedience, and my flesh keeps objecting.
Being in Brasil has been a totally surreal experience, because I've lived here, but I'm going home. I speak the language, but I'm on a team of people who don't. I realized this evening that I really did leave a life down here -- friends, a routine, an entire ministry. I walked into a life that had been established for me. Now I'm establishing a life for myself (or, rather, we're establishing a life for ourselves). We're going back to reality from a place of rest.
I have spent the last year and a half in a city that is totally different than any culture I've ever experienced, in a job that is, frankly, hard many more days than not, and in a season of providing for the family. And I've complained. Oh, how I've complained. I have worried. I am Israel. I have seen God part the Red Sea, and I've made it to....the wilderness. My memory is shorter than it's ever been, and I have a husband who sees my complaining spirit and still doesn't complain himself. Part of me thinks that this season is to teach me how to be in the wilderness, that I need to know how to be in the wilderness without complaining, for God has brought me here and He has plans for later. For now, this is His plan. He is asking for my obedience, and my flesh keeps objecting.
Being in Brasil has been a totally surreal experience, because I've lived here, but I'm going home. I speak the language, but I'm on a team of people who don't. I realized this evening that I really did leave a life down here -- friends, a routine, an entire ministry. I walked into a life that had been established for me. Now I'm establishing a life for myself (or, rather, we're establishing a life for ourselves). We're going back to reality from a place of rest.
July 20, 2010
We're headed to Brasil this week for a mission trip. Needless to say, I'm really excited, because it's the first time the D-man and I have been back since we got hitched. He's going to be the construction foreman and I'm going to be the pharmacist. We're working at the leper hospital, in a prison, and in a church.
I have a normal week of work, and I leave Friday night. D-man leaves tomorrow night. I am so excited to see what God has in store for us.
I have a normal week of work, and I leave Friday night. D-man leaves tomorrow night. I am so excited to see what God has in store for us.
July 02, 2010
June 28, 2010
D-man and I are back from a long weekend in Utah. Mike & A got married this weekend, and family weddings are always fun. We stayed at the Snowbird Resort, and there's tons to do there in the summer. Alpine slide, zipline, mechanical bull, hiking, biking, heading up to the top of the mountain (where there was still snow). I would love to return in the winter, to ski and snowmobile.
The wedding was at La Caille, where a few scenes in Dumb and Dumber were filmed. It's such a beautiful place, and it houses a winery and restaurant. Peacocks, geese, swans, and ducks all grace the grounds, along with flowers, a couple of ponds, grapevines, and a golfing green. They provided canned champagne for us bridesmaids (one for each of us and the bride), complete with straws. I felt like I was drinking Capri Sun for adults.
Now that we're back, I'll post pictures soon. I'm ready for another vacation. One not involving family.
The wedding was at La Caille, where a few scenes in Dumb and Dumber were filmed. It's such a beautiful place, and it houses a winery and restaurant. Peacocks, geese, swans, and ducks all grace the grounds, along with flowers, a couple of ponds, grapevines, and a golfing green. They provided canned champagne for us bridesmaids (one for each of us and the bride), complete with straws. I felt like I was drinking Capri Sun for adults.
Now that we're back, I'll post pictures soon. I'm ready for another vacation. One not involving family.
June 17, 2010
It's been awhile....
I've been completely remiss in my blogging habits lately, because I've been (gasp!) busy. Busy with work, busy with trying to hold a home and a marriage together (before you worry, D-man and I are fine), busy trying to figure out what the Lord has to teach me. And man, let me tell you, it's glorious.
May 13, 2010
Dear Mr. Man:
If you come in and expect me to wait on you when you're talking on your cell phone in a foreign language (for the record, I have no problem with the foreign language part, just the cell phone part), you can expect slower (and somewhat annoyed) service. If you pay no attention to me when I'm standing in front of you, patiently waiting on you to finish your phone call so I can ask you a question, you can expect that I'm going to be annoyed. If, after all that, you ask me about taking a competitor coupon that's expired, you're going to get a no. Do we take competitor coupons? Yes. Do we take them when they're expired? Nope. Not a chance. It doesn't matter that you ask me 3 times to ask the manager. It's against company policy. Period. No matter how many times you ask me if I'll take it, no matter how many excuses you give me for not coming yesterday before it expired, the answer is no. The other company wouldn't take their own expired coupon; why do you expect me to?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)